Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Idris Elba

Idris Elba made a name for himself playing the most raginling badass man in TV history with his portrayal as Stringer Bell on The Wire. He followed that up as The Office chick magnet in his role as Charles Miner. Basically this guy is awesome, and his mustache must be at least partially attributed to his amazing theatrical success.

Random side note: In looking for his characters name on The Office, I found out that he was British, which was a total mind blow.

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Roscoe Orman

Roscoe Orman is best known for playing Gordon Robinson on Sesame Street. However, he is also an accomplished writer and child advocate...and according to Sesame Street's website he's a strong male role model. I certainly agree that his 'stache is something we should all strive for.

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Robert Goulet

Hello Johnny...Doc. Where's Freddy? Freddy Dakota?...he still owe's me $80. It's good to be back in Burbank. GOOOO-LET!

Thursday, November 5, 2009

Mario

Let's get it out of the way right now and declare that Super Mario Bros. and Super Mario Kart are ragingly badass games. However, the most amazing thing about Mario is how a lowly plumber can lock down Princess Peach. No, it's not because he saved her from the dungeons...it's because of his striking mustache. Bippidi-Beppidi!

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

Clay Zavada

Congratulations are certainly in order for Clay Zavada. Ladies and Gentelmen, the American Mustache Institute's 'StacheBash winner for '09!!!

Friday, October 23, 2009

Dale Earnhardt

Dale Earnhardt was one of the most popular racers in the history of NASCAR. #3 won the respect of many a hillbilly, and I think that a lot of that can be attributed to this fine push-broom style lip whisker. We miss you, Dale.

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Mark Sanchez

A few Sundays ago Dan Dierdorf remarked, “And that mustache wasn’t there last week. It looks like Mr. Sanchez is taking a mustache out for a test drive this week.” That may be one of the greatest quotes of all time. However, in the last game no 'stache? Well Sr. Sanchez...I say you take it out for another spin. Give it time and you'll look like this artists rendering:

George Parros

When your nickname is the 'Stache, there's a pretty decent chance you'll make it on this blog. Add in a South Bay address, and it's a cinch. Yes George, as you were quoted in '07, "The 'stache demands respect."

Barack Obama

All the power ties in the world won't add up to the effect of a nicely maintained soup strainer. If you want to be the most powerful man in the world, you better act like it!

Top 5 Civil War General Mustaches

IT'S A TOP 5 LIST!!! In a trend of thing's to come, CM will be giving a run-down of the top 5 mustaches of a particular genre. Today, top 5 mustaches of the powerful leaders of the civil war...
#5 Robert Rodes

General Rodes graduated from VMI in 1848 and rose quickly through the ranks of the confederate army. It has been said that “Stonewall” Jackson was mesmarized by Rodes’ ability to fashion his mustache into a near perfect right angle. Alas, Rodes does not make it further up this list, because he was not actually much of a soldier. He was wounded in the battle of Seven Pines and later killed in battle in the Shenandoah Valley

#4 Philip Sheridan

Abraham Lincoln described his appearance as: "A brown, chunky little chap, with a long body, short legs, not enough neck to hang him, and such long arms that if his ankles itch he can scratch them without stooping.” Despite this extremely insulting description, in 1865 his cavalry pursued Gen. Robert E. Lee and was instrumental in forcing his surrender at Appomattox. The protection of the Yellowstone area was Sheridan's personal crusade which is not surprising, since many mustachioed men have crusaded for the preservation of Amercia’s National Parks.

#3 P.G.T. Beauregard

P.G.T. Beauregard became the first Confederate brigadier general and commanded the defenses of Charleston, South Carolina, for the start of the Civil War at Fort Sumter on April 12, 1861. Beauregard and Confederate President Jefferson Davis (a clean shaven fellow), had a strained relationship (no surprise). It’s been said Davis’ dislike of the mustache led to the fall of the confederacy. After the war, Beauregard started the Lousiana Lottery, and in turn amassed quite a fortune.

#2 General Ambrose Burnside

Burnside was always very popular—both in the army and in politics. He made friends easily, smiled a lot, and remembered everyone's name. His professional military reputation, however, was less positive, and he was known for being obstinate, unimaginative, and unsuited both intellectually and emotionally for high command. In case you were curious, YES his distinctive style of facial hair IS now known as sideburns, derived from his last name.

#1 George McClellan

McClellan’s first military action was during the Mexican-American War. He arrived near the mouth of the Rio Grande in October 1846, well prepared for action with a double-barreled shotgun, two pistols, a saber, a dress sword, and a Bowie knife (BADASS!). He was also the most popular of that army's commanders with its soldiers, who felt that he had their morale and well-being as paramount concerns...and a deep reverence for his facial hair.

Paul Simon


Happy 68th Birthday to Paul Simon. It's fairly obvious why Paul Simon was my favorite member of Simon & Garfunkel.

Monday, October 12, 2009

Tony Sporano


Tony Sporano looked fired up tonight after the Miami Dolphins nailbiting MNF victory tonight. Tony's aggressive use of the Wildcat offense and admirable facial hair are both due credit.

Friday, September 25, 2009

American Mustache Institute



In CM's never ending quest to delve deep into mustache knowledge, I fell accross a website for The American Mustache Institute. AMI has a noble cause that I would like to pass along. Take it away:

"Bias is everywhere, and the deep discrimination against the Mustached American race in the United States has been pervasive since the 1960s.

Acceptance of lip sweaters has ebbed and flowed, but the mustache’s glory years, of course, were the 1970s, when a man or woman could wear a mustache without scorn. Virtually overnight, as disco faded and Walter Cronkite left television, the cookie duster became a fad seen only on law enforcement, moto-cross drivers, and members of the Village People.

Enter the St. Louis-based American Mustache Institute (AMI), with headquarters nestled in the shadow of the world's largest mustache - the Gateway Arch. We are freedom fighters, civil libertarians if you will – working against the bias and stereotyping plaguing the Mustached American race."

Landry Jones vs. Colt McCoy




Landry Jones has become one of the hottest topics of this early college football season. Not only has he been thrust into the starting lineup due to an injury to the reigning Heisman trophy winner, but now he has gained celebrity status due to his unparalleled classiness. Looks like OU is trying to keep up with their rivals

Thursday, September 10, 2009

Peter Griffin

Brian: I think it's gay
Peter: Oh yeah? Well, if I'm gay then Freddie Mercury was gay
Brian: Freddie Mercury, the lead singer of Queen? He was incredibly gay!
Peter: He was not. He had a mustache. That's practically like having a wedding band.

Thursday, August 20, 2009

Ron Burgondy?


Take a quick tip from our man from Action News, if you want to cultivate a manly 'stache, it is required to regularly fertilize your upper lip with a healthy dose of Scotch. You're right Ron, you do look good!

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Simple Reference Guide

During our brief summer hiatus, you may have thought we've lost our way. Untrue, we've been gathering research on as many different mustache types as possible. Above is the culmination of our research.

Thursday, April 16, 2009

NHL: Mustache v. Mustache


I find that it is no surpise that the most anticipated playoff matchup of them all is 'Hawks v. Flames. Is it because of Mike Keenans' former post as Blackhawks coach? No! Adrian Aucoin's swap of teams? No! Is Jim Vandemeer a douche? Yes! (not related to mustache talk). Anyhow, this is the lone mustache v. mustache battle in the first round of the playoffs. Whoever wins this series, by my math, will be hoisting the cup come June. Since the launch of CM, no non-mustachioed coach has won the Stanley Cup, and I would be shocked if it happened this year. Let the best man (Q) win!!!

Dr. Phil

One of the members of the CM staff was on jury duty this week. In the jury room, he was distracted by a silly southern voice with little information. It was this blowhard. Dr. Phil is in the minority of people who should shave their mustaches off. I think that it's a relief to know that that's not a real mustache, rather a transplant from the top of his head to the top of his lip. We're not fooled!!!

TGIF: Carl Winslow



I think that it is apparent that this is the most respected cop in Chicago. There is no better 'stache on the force.

Sunday, April 5, 2009

Ned Colletti & Kenny Williams


Minutes away from the first real pitch of the year, here is Celebrity Mustaches pick for the world series...Dodgers v. White Sox. Let the games begin!!!

Jason Giambi

One of the most highly publicized mustache efforts of the 21st century, Jason Giambi really does a service to the mustache community with this gem.

Gary Gaetti

Gary does not look very intellectual in this photo. Nonetheless he hit 360 bombs and has a solid soup strainer.

John Candelaria

I love all baseball players with mustaches...check that...I like most baseball players with mustaches. This is pitiful John.

Keith Hernandez

But I'm Keith Hernandez!!!

Rollie Fingers

I think that it's fair to say, Rollie Fingers has the most famous mustache in baseball history. I think it's also fair to say that every ounce of that credit is well-deserved. This is spectacular.

Wade Boggs

Boggs is rumored to have consumed sixty-four beers over a flight from Boston to Anaheim. Although he has denied the number, Wade said, "it was nothing to be proud of...let's just say it was a few Miller Lites." Not a shock that Wade can hold his booze, considering those respectable whiskers.

Jack Morris

And I tip my hat to your well-groomed whiskers, Jack.

Sal Fasano

Jeff Pearlman said of Fasano: "When I think of Sal Fasano, however, I think of greatness. Not of Willie Mays or Ted Williams greatness, but of a uniquely excellent human being who, were class and decency the most valued standards of a career, would be the easiest Hall of Fame inductee of all time." Obviously, look at the 'stache.

Rod Beck

There was some controversy around this post. Not because Rod is rocking hardcore facial hair...because he is. But whether or not a Fu-Manchu was a mustache, or was it in the goatee family. Our research department consulted with Wikipedia and..."A Fu Manchu mustache is a full mustache that extends downward past the lips and on either side of the chin." Controversy eliminated.

Jim Leyland

Whatcha got there James?

Russell Martin

For those of you who question the need for veteran leadership in a clubhouse, just look at the positive effect that Jeff Kent had on young Rusty Martin.

Sammy Sosa


Take steroids, shave mustache...get beaned in the head. An important lesson for everyone.

Robin Yount

Later in his career Robin grew a much thicker and fuller mustache. But I want to celebrate Robin's desire to nurture his 'stache from an early age. Something for all youngsters should keep in mind.

Dave Stewart

I think that I speak for everybody when I say I wish I had been in Oakland on 8/6/88 for Dave Stewart button-pin day.

Rance Mulliniks

I have to admit, I have no idea who this is. His picture showed up when I was looking for Pat Borders pics. But his name is Rance, and he has a mustache...so welcome aboard!

Dick Pole

It's good that Dick Pole was a major leaguer. Imagine the taunts he would have received if he was a CPA.

Reggie Jackson

"Mr. October" makes a nice run at Doug Drabek for things that make mustaches even sweeter. 'Fros and Aviators can now join mullets for things that accentuate mustaches perfectly.

Ken Griffey Jr./Sr.

Previous posts (Cecil, Doug, Tony) proved that the desire to grow a mustache is not genetic, it is nice to see this father/son duo. It's a shame that this picture is more than a little bit suggestive...and that's just not right.

Cecil Fielder

Was Cecil was a vegetarian too?